Not many parents would say they intentionally left their daughters at a disadvantage, however it is true in many cases that boys are instilled with a 'tough it out and take care of yourself' attitude, which although it may not teach specific financial skills, does allow for the development of survival and negotiation skills which often translate to earning more and handling financial decisions with more necessity and therefore less fear.
The facts are ideed frightening: many millions of women who leave financial decisions to their husbands are left destitute or fear-ridden later in life. Dr. Thomas Stanley's enlightening book 'Millionaire Women Next Door' profiles a number of women who felt that their financial lives were taken care of and found, to their dismay, that things were not as easy as they once thought. This book is invaluable for the insights it offers into the mind of very (financially) successful women, however it also ffers some sobering thoughts on just what we are discussing today. The following are excerpts from the book:
You must develop self-reliance now. Otherwise, sometime in the future you will have to deal with the inevitable consequences of this lack... / ...Attention, women! This is a wake-up call. You can love a man with all your heart and admire his sincere intentions when he tells you 'I will always be here for you,' but never, ever believe him or anyone else who tells you:
You never have to worry about money. Let me take care of the economic issues for you.- or -
You do not need to concern yourself with ever being on your own or paying your own way. That's why I'm here.
... / ...The odds are about four to one that your husband will die before you do... / ...Women, whether you work outside the home or not, you must develop budgeting, saving, and investing skills. ... / ...You must insist on sharing the responsibility for investing your way to financial independence. If you don't know how to deal with money, it will not matter if your husband leaves you well off financially. You may not even be certain how to judge those professional money managers who want you as a prime client. If you do not have investing skills, you, the millionaire widow, will likely be uncomfortable, even frightened, about the prospect of having to deal with money issues for the first time in your life.
I might add to this that whether your husband leaves you millions or nothing, fear of the financial world which stems from ignorance leaves you very vulnerable to people who would take advantage of you and leave you even worse off.However, the past does not equal the future. Handling money in profitable and intelligent ways is a skill that can be developed by anyone, and that means you. Even if you think you know something about finances, learn more. There is more to learn than can be learned in a lifetime, and it can and should be really fun once you get into it. The higher your comfort level, the more astute an investor you will be. As you learn to judge opportunities wisely, you will feel a sense of self-confidence and power that, ironically, money cannot buy.
Where to begin? It doesn't matter. Just begin. Read, ask questions, learn and learn some more. If you feel you don't have the time, wipe that excuse right out of your mind with the sobering thought that someday you may be left alone and frightened about your future, wishing you had invested (no pun intended) the time NOW. Anyone can do this. YOU can do it!
P.S. For those who feel this is a 'big' challenge, you might enjoy reading this article: The Power of Underachieving.
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